DieHardBrownsFan Posted December 20, 2013 Report Share Posted December 20, 2013 Okay, now for the joke: Text from daughter to mom: "Hello mom, I need your advice. I have some of my boyfriend's cum stuck in my hair. How do I get it out? Will I have to cut it out?" Text from mom to daughter:"It’s nice you can send me such a frank text. No, you won't have to cut it out. I've had loads of cum in my hair over the years and it will just wash out." Daughter back to mom:"OMG, mom... I'm sorry, I meant to spell gum (G-U-M)." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calfoxwc Posted December 21, 2013 Report Share Posted December 21, 2013 Obamao and moochelle go to Africa. They go on a shopping spree way out in the boondocks. They buy 500 lbs of souveniors, but when the bush plane lands to pick them up, the pilot says "hey, I can't haul both of you, and that 500 lbs. Buttock says "Hey, I'm president, and you can keep your doctor and your ins...I mean, it should be no problem. Moochelle says, "look, you white honkey, the last time, the pilot came and picked us up with the same plane, and he took off just fine with our 500 lbs of stuff, too.." So, the pilot was intimidated, and relented. Obamao and moochelle and the 500 lbs of stuff climbed aboard, and the plane took off. Moments later, however, the pilot had to make an emergency crash landing. The Obamaos climbed out of the wreckage, and glared at the pilot and moochelle asks Buttock, "Where the hell are we?" And Buttock says: "About the same place we crashed last time." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MLD Woody Posted December 21, 2013 Report Share Posted December 21, 2013 Ha ha ha . ....... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sadbrownsfan Posted December 23, 2013 Report Share Posted December 23, 2013 A liberal voter and a conservative voter argue while walking into a bar, the independent voter ducks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DieHardBrownsFan Posted December 26, 2013 Author Report Share Posted December 26, 2013 Wife is mad because: · Last night she said she wanted to make a sex movie, and all I did was suggest we should hold auditions for her part. · My sister-in-law sat on my glasses and broke them. It was my own fault. I should have taken them off. · I spent a couple of hours defrosting the fridge last night, or "foreplay" as she likes to call it. · After both suffering from depression for a while, the wife and I were going to commit suicide yesterday. But strangely enough, once she killed herself, I started to feel a lot better. So I thought, screw it, I'll soldier on! · I woke up this morning at 8 and just felt that something was wrong. I got downstairs and found the wife face down on the kitchen floor, not breathing! I panicked. I didn't know what to do. Then I remembered McDonald's serves breakfast until 11:30. · The other night, my wife asked me how many women I'd slept with. I told her, "Only you. All the others kept me awake all night!" · My wife packed my bags and said "GET OUT!!!". As I walked out the front door, she screamed, "I wish you a slow and painful death, you bastard!" "Oh," I replied, "so now you want me to stay!" · I've just installed strobe lights in the bedroom. It makes the wife look like she's moving during sex. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.