calfoxwc Posted May 17, 2010 Report Share Posted May 17, 2010 > >> Three handsome male dogs are walking down the street when they see a >> beautiful, enticing, female poodle. >> >> The three male dogs fall all over themselves in an effort to be the one to >> reach her first, but they end up arriving in front of her at the same time. >> >> The males are speechless before her beauty, slobbering on themselves and >> hoping for just a glance from her in return. >> >> Aware of her charms and her obvious effect on the three suitors, she >> decides to be kind and tells them, "The first one who can use the words 'liver' >> and 'cheese' together in an imaginative, intelligent sentence can go out with >> me." >> >> The sturdy, muscular black lab speaks up quickly and says, "I love liver >> and cheese." >> >> "Oh, how childish," says the poodle. "That shows no imagination or >> intelligence whatsoever." She turns to the tall, shiny golden retriever and says, >> "How well can you do?" >> >> "Um ... I HATE liver and cheese," blurts the golden retriever. >> >> "My, my," says the poodle. "I guess it's hopeless. That's just as dumb as >> the lab's sentence." She then turns to the last of the three dogs and says, >> "How about you, little guy?" >> >> The last of the three, tiny in stature but big in fame and finesse, is the >> Taco Bell chihuahua. He gives her a smile and a sly wink, turns to the >> golden retriever and the lab, and says... >> >> "Liver alone. Cheese mine." >> >> > Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
calfoxwc Posted May 19, 2010 Author Report Share Posted May 19, 2010 A beautiful fairy appeared one day to a destitute illegal Mexican refugee outside an Arizona immigration office. "Good man," the fairy said, "I've been sent here by President Obama and told to grant you three wishes, since you just arrived in the United States with your wife and eight children." The man told the fairy, "Well, where I come from we don't have good teeth, so I want new teeth, maybe a lot of gold in them." The fairy looked at the man's almost toothless grin and -- PING !-- he had a brand new shining set of gold teeth in his mouth! "What else?" asked the fairy, "Two more to go." The illegal immigrant claimant now got bolder. "I need a big house with a three car garage in Annapolis on the water with eight bedrooms for my family and the rest of my relatives who still live in my country.. I want to bring them all over here" --- and -- PING !-- in the distance there could be seen a beautiful mansion with a three car garage, a long driveway, a walkout patio with a BBQ in an upscale neighborhood overlooking the bay. "One more wish", said the fairy, waving her wand. "Yes, one more wish. I want to be like an American with American clothes instead of these torn clothes, and a baseball cap instead of this sombrero. And I want to have white skin like Americans" ---and --- PING ! -- The man was transformed - wearing worn out jeans, a Baltimore Orioles T-shirt and a baseball cap. He had his bad teeth back and the mansion had disappeared from the horizon. "What happened to my new teeth?" He wailed, "Where is my new house?" THIS IS GOOD . . . . . . . . NO, ACTUALLY THIS IS VERY GOOD . . . . . . . The fairy said: "Tough shit, Amigo, Now that you are a White American, you have to fend for yourself." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Archived
This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.